About TOBET

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– Interactive Calendar

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TOBET
4507 Lone Star Dr.
Carrollton, TX 75010
972-849-6543

1. Ask everyone, “What does it mean to be a man?” Write down answers. Follow up with “Who are your heroes?” Write down answers.
   1. Hold up a cross. Do we think of Christ as our model of what it means to be a man? Can we look at Jesus on the cross and admire his manhood? (That is why it is important to have crosses with Jesus crucified on them)
2. Jesus as the model of manhood
   1. Gift of self. How did Jesus relate to his disciples? He was a friend, encourager, teacher, father… laughed with them but also was not afraid to put his foot down, even when his own disciples thought He was wrong.
      1. How do we like to make gifts of ourselves? We like to be productive and create things to make other people happy.
      2. We like to help others. Service projects.
      3. We want to protect that which we think is sacred and beautiful, particularly women.
      4. We have a desire to share ourselves to the point of getting hurt. Look at many of our heroes in literature. They gave their lives for love.
      5. HOW DO WE GIVE OURSELVES IN THAT WAY?
      6. To be a man is to be imaged in fatherhood, like our Father. What does it mean to be a father?
3. Dating/Chastity
   1. Meaning of women
      1. When you see the true beauty of a woman, you don’t want to use her. You kiss a girl to honor her, not for your own pleasure. A kiss is an affirmation of her goodness and a sign that you want to lift her up and help her be as beautiful as she can be. It’s supposed to feel good, but that’s also why we feel so guilty later if we twist that and kiss someone for the wrong reasons. Do we see kissing this way?
      2. Anything other than this is a counterfeit! This is why pornography is so deadly. When you run across this, don’t be afraid! The power of Christ is stronger if we ask for His help. Pornography trains our mind to look at women as objects, which I’m sure you know. If you know what the true beauty of a woman is, you will be able to tell the real thing from the counterfeit. You can tell the difference between what will truly make you happy and what will only make you happy for a little while followed by emptiness.
      3. God made you a man to protect women, not use them!!!
   2. How do we stay strong?
      1. Be careful about who your friends are. Choose guys who believe in this true vision of manhood… who see Christ as the ultimate man. Nobody can be this strong alone… we all need support. With high school just around the corner for you, you know what it’s in store. You need to build up your support core now. We need groups of men like you who are willing, in the face of a culture that uses each other out of desperation, loneliness and fear, that there is something more! They are desperate deep inside for other guys to show them the way. This is what TOB did for me and it is absolutely the right way. I wish I had heard this when I was your age. You live in an exciting time!
      2. What we do now affects our future vocation. I know it’s too early to think about this, but what you do now will affect the kind of example you set for your future family (or parish if you become a priest). Acting like a true man causes us to be responsible for our actions. But that’s an awesome thing!!! Christ knows we may fall, which is why he gave us the sacrament of Confession. He wants to heal us and give us more strength when we leave the confessional to go back out and keep loving the right way.
      3. Keep in touch with what John Paul II is doing. A lot of people say, he’s out of touch and he’s not married so what can he say about dating and chastity? Just because he chose to be a priest does not mean he gave up being a man. He still has all the desires and dreams and feelings we do. He is just using it in the way God his calling him to. But he has spent much of his 25 years crying out to men to be courageous! (Read World Youth Day quote).
   IV Closing
   1. God made us men for a reason, and he has given us the courage and strength to be that man. It is important every day to remind yourself of this, so that we never lose sight of Christ’s sacrifice on the cross (hold up cross).
   2. Deep in their hearts, women want nothing more than a man who care for them and lift them up… they are made, just as we are, to give ourselves to one woman in marriage. We are told by society to have fun now and then settle down later, but our hearts are not that way and that goes against every bit of manhood in us! That’s because God created us to be warriors who fight for what’s right and to fight for true love. This is not a dream!
   3. Dream! Be idealistic! Be courageous! If you’re shy, that’s OK. God creates people uniquely, and in striving to be a good man, you’ll learn His plan for you. You’ll thank yourself, and women will thank you too. Be willing to give your life as Christ did and you will truly be happy.